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Revision Blues

You’ve written the perfect novel. It is a combination of E. Hemmingway,
S. King and B. Potter. You have dreams of six-figure advances and the New York Times Top Ten. Congratulations! I hope you make it. Maybe you will, but don’t send that love child off to the publishers yet. It’s time to really start writing, or rewriting.

It’s called revision, or editing, and it sucks big time. Every writer approaches it differently but no one enjoys the laborious process of poring over your novel (Or short story) line-by-line, page-by- page, character-by-character. It’s more fun to write. That’s why we write, isn’t it?

I just received a rejection for one of my novels, Blood Lust, but it was a good rejection letter. They loved the story but pointed out a flow problem in chapter six,
informing me politely that if I wished to correct the problem and resubmit they
would be pleased. (Would I?) Was I angry? I had revised and edited the story several times before submitting. How could they believe there were errors?

There were. I had made the ultimate error in writing. I had read and edited my beloved child with my heart and not my eyes. Editors are heartless, ruthless, vile creatures lurking in musty basements, surviving on errors and spitting out facsimiles of your original novel. (They’re not really but that’s how it seems. They are an integral part of the team.)

There are several steps to editing. Here’s how I do it. (Now)

1. Set your novel aside for a while, as long as possible. Then read it again. Does it still strike horror in your heart or make your heart dance with joy? Good.
2. Concentrate on the Story Line, the tale you wish to tell, the conflict between
   characters. Is it compelling? Is it believable? (Even fantasy must be believable.)
3. Next, work on the Pace of the story. Is it a page turner or does it plod along like the last nag I bet on at the racetrack? The best story will not survive a poor telling (Or showing – remember, show don’t tell).
4. Are your Characters interesting or cardboard cutouts? Would we recognize him or her on the street from your description? Would we have tea with her or a beer with him? One good character isn’t a story unless the conflict is there. Each character should stand out, even the potential corpses (I write lots of horror).
5. What about Voice with a capital V? Does the Voice add drama or tension to the story or does it sound like you’re whispering secrets to the wind? Voice needs to match the story with a dash of You, the writer thrown in for flavor.
6. “Dialogue. There, I said it,” he said. Dialogue should describe place or characters, move the plot (Storyline) or foreshadow. Don’t use it as a convenient info dump. If it doesn’t do one of the aforementioned, drop it. It’s just filler.
7. Grammar. (No, not Grandma) Need I say more? The best story will not survive poor grammar. Spell-check only goes so far (Believe me, I know). Look for word usage. Is there a better word than the one you used? Do you repeat words too often? Make certain each word conveys what you mean, succinctly and precisely. Look for punctuation errors or bad habits. Did you use too many commas, exclamation points, colons, semicolons or dashes? These little (Little?) things detract from the flow, confuse the reader and irritate editors.  I read very fast. I have to remember to read slowly, saying each word to myself or aloud or I tend to miss common errors – a for an, or an for and, he for her, etc.

 Remember. Good stories do sell but great stories sell better. Editors might want your novel but see you, the writer, as a hopeless cause, not worth the time. Make
the editor’s job a little easier and he or she will appreciate it and perhaps read
just a little farther into your novel. Maybe even to ‘The End’.

I write a lot of horror. In horror people die, often in the most gruesome manner, at least if I’m doing it right. However, I too often read death scenes that, while highly visual, are hardly believable. I don’t refer to the old ‘There’s a monster in the basement; let’s split up and look for it’ or the ‘I know you said wait here but I want to
wander around aimlessly, totally unaware and unarmed’ ploy. I mean the ‘Rip my
guts out and I’ll still kill you’ ploy.

I’ve never fought a war but I did work in several hospital emergency rooms. I’ve seen lots of death and severe wounds. People rarely suffer a severe wound and drive themselves to the ER. In cases of severe wounds, the body goes into shock. It’s a defense mechanism. Blood pools around the injury and the victim often passes out.

The same goes for head injuries. I know Arnold S. or Sylvester S. can get beat up, hit
over the head with a metal pipe and have both eyes pulped, then find a hidden
reserve of energy and defeat the villain, but most people can’t. Equally, the
can get shot in the shoulder, the leg and possibly the side and still chase
down and kick some ass.

Get real! I know this looks good on TV or the movies and might read well, but it ain’t so!

Don’t get me wrong. I love making things up. That’s my job. But I try to get as many facts correct as I can, whether it’s location, dates, or fights. Then I go off on a
tangent and let my imagination go wild. To me, at least, it seems more believable,
unlike early comic books (Graphic novels) which depicted epic battles that
should have killed both participants and any onlookers.

I’m not naysaying writers who like to stretch the boundaries a bit: To each his/her
own. Being more realistic in fight scenes, explosions, etc. makes the
characters more real. No matter how good a shape you’re in, you can’t dodge a
bullet, block a well delivered blow from a steel pipe with your forearm, or
grab a thrust sword blade between your palms (Ref: Mythbusters).

If your character is important enough to write about, he/she deserves a believable (If ignominious) death scene. Deaths, like dialogue, should serve to advance the storyline or build or change your characters. Death scenes, if done properly, can evoke emotion (Love Story), revenge (Collateral Damage), fear (Alien) or satisfaction (See Alien again). Handled improperly, it can detract from an otherwise enjoyable
read.

One of my early mentors, Jonathan Maberry, instilled in me the desire and the logic to inject reality into my fiction. A careful balance between the two enhances the
story, builds more believable worlds and defines character. This is especially
true of location. As a Tucsonan, I’m horrified to see movies with Giant
Saguaros in the background when the action takes place in Boliva, or a
character in a novel enjoying the scent of Magnolia blossoms in South Dakota. I
know I might be nitpicking, but it takes my mind from the read to the error.

Give your characters an honorable death. Make it real.

  Character is defined as the nature, quality, temperament or moral fiber of an individual. Adults become the child and its environment. Much is said about slum children or ghetto children or even one-parent children, their disadvantages and the poor likelihood of their success. I dispute this. While disadvantages are just that, disadvantages, character makes the person.

  What about your characters? I know they do not spring full-grown from your mind and fall glibly upon the page. Somewhere deep in your psyche they undergo conception, birth and childhood. You set them upon their course and direct their movements. Are they cardboard cutouts, mere automatons upon which you heap the trials of Job or Jonah or are they flesh and blood people who live, love, yearn and die?

  Characters make the story. Indeed, without them, there is no story. Doesn’t it follow that a compelling story needs compelling characters? What would Moby Dick be without peg-legged and whale scarred Captain Ahab or Lord of the Rings without good-natured, loyal Samwise? Not only your protagonist, your antagonist and host of supporting characters need lives as well. Who cares if a cardboard cutout dies a violent death or if a spineless, sniveling whiner threatens to destroy the galaxy?

  Just like a child, you develop them from the ground up. Reading is visual but the images are created in the reader’s mind by your words. Help your readers by giving them a framework with which to work. Describe your characters, not coldly and clinically as if they are admiring themselves in a mirror, but in bits and pieces as the story unfolds. How do they move – boldly, timidly, with a limp? What color hair – red hair brings connotations of quick anger or taunting as a child (Towhead?) Long black hair often denotes sultry, exotic. Is their face stern, jolly, handsome, scarred, fat, thin? Do they speak with a lisp, in rhyme, with a foreign accent? Do they play ball, jog, smoke, sit on the couch and chug beer and eat pretzels?

  Look around you. There are millions of characters out there, each with a story. Just take a typical bar (Or pub in the UK). Are your characters as varied as the people sitting around you? If not, they should be. Above all, your characters should be individuals with which the reader can relate and form a bond that lasts until the end of the story and hopefully farther. Your characters determine the direction, the scope and the theme of your story as much as the story develops and grows your characters. Like individuals, they grow from their testing their environment, the obstacles you place in the way of their quest, whether it is saving the world, winning the big game or finding the perfect mate. Both grow together, story and characters. Nurture them well.

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    Writers often forget the most important factor in becoming a successful author – the reader. The reader is essential, the life and breath of a writer. An author’s job is to satisfy the reader. Author satisfaction is secondary. After all, don’t you want to make each novel better, to improve your craft? An author should never be satisfied until the reader is. Below are 5 points in which I firmly believe. I hope they prove useful to you.

1. Credit the readers. Readers are usually intelligent creatures. It is best to think of them as more intelligent than you, the writer. This avoids those nasty little details that trip up readers – loose plot points, disappearing characters, obvious foreshadowing that fails to materialize … the list goes on. As a writer, you know what is going on and don’t need those little hints or adding a name instead of ‘he said’ or ‘she said’ or ‘He looked at her’ to keep track of the conversation. This is my biggest mistake, which I have to dutifully go back and correct. My dialogues flow rapidly and it’s easy to confuse the reader, especially with multiple characters speaking.
2. Be original. Don’t think for a moment that your readers haven’t read the classics or perused more novels than you have. They often have. Rehashing earlier movies works for movies but often does not for novels. If not plagiarism, it is at least an insult to the reader and the original author unless, of course, you give them credit or are writing a spoof. Originality scores high marks with readers.
3. Challenge the reader.  Surprises keep the reader interested. A flat, dull chapter ending discourages turning to the next chapter. Why do you think serial adventures were so popular at the movies in the 40s and 50s? Cliffhangers still work.   
4. Teach the reader. Readers usually choose authors and topics with which they are comfortable. Using strings of polysyllabic words is okay for textbooks but not for light reading. Be concise and real, but do choose some words that send the reader to the dictionary. Learning new adjectives or words or phrases from other cultures keeps the reader coming back. No sixteen-year old or even thirty-something reader wants to read a Grade School level book. Most people inherit the vocabulary in which their culture, their geography or their literary preferences immerse them. 
5. Enlist the reader. The average writer will author more than one novel. If you want to retain readers, you must enlist them in your cadre of fans. Encourage dialogue though social networking – blogs, websites, Facebook, Twitter, etc. Encourage critiques of your work. They will be honest in their opinion and, after all, it is they you need to please, not friends or family. Social networking is easier and less costly and time consuming than book signings or conventions and you can reach more people. Become tech savvy. Utilize the new technological tools available to writers. Even an old dog like me can learn a few new tricks.                         

  I just spent three glorious days in Austin, Texas at the WHC 2011 mingling with big name writers, old friends and new ones. Our suite at the Doubletree was awesome. It was as big as a small apartment with four windows and a balcony and the beds were great. The Doubletree is an old hotel with amazing architectural features, a far cry from most cookie-cutter hotels. It made relaxing easy. The Doubletree was easily the nicest hotel I’ve stayed in at a convention. Now, on to the convention.

  Wrath White outdid himself this time. The set up was fantastic and went as smooth as clockwork. I had three pitch sessions and pitched three different books. All editors asked for copies. Nice! My reading of a few passages from Hell Rig at the Damnation Book party went well and I sold a few copies from it. It was lots of fun. I especially loved Lincoln Crisler’s reading with his animated voices of characters. Kim Richards and company did a wonderful job.

  Note to networking – I met Clair LaVay, writer of House of De Bauch vampire comics at a pitch session. We talked a bit about my book Hell Rig and she commented it would make a great movie. About ten o’clock Saturday night – I was already undressed – she called my room and told me she had met a man on the elevator looking for an action-filled horror novel for a movie and told him about mine. I met her at the Cutting Block Press party and talked to an unnamed gentleman about my book, gave him a copy and he said he would read it and contact me. He and some friends make 3-4 movies for the Cannes Film Festival every year and wanted some horror. Here’s hoping! Thank’s to Clair LaVay. Hope her comic flourishes.

  My wife and I ate at Pappadeaux’s. Great Cajun food. The red beans and rice and seafood gumbo were to die for and I should know. I’m a chef who learned his trade in New Orleans. I wish there was one in Tucson. The food in the Doubletree was very good but the menu was limited. Chili’s and Pappasito’s Mexican restaurant were next door though.

  The mass signing was a little weird. There were about a hundred writers and maybe fifty buyers but it was a good experience. My real luck was at my book launch party in my hometown of Corinth, MS. I sold about forty books in two hours. It was good to see my family. We just made it back before the floods got too bad in Arkansas. We left in the middle of the night and made a 125 mile detour that wound up taking 5 hours but that was better than the 11 mile backup on I-40 the next day.

  I’ve been to several WHCs and HWA Cons and Killer Cons and Copper Cons but this was the best ever. I hope it was productive and fruitful.